One year ago, about this time, Tessa Kate joined our family and I was holding my baby girl in my arms. I remember a lot of details from that day, and I wrote a lot of them down because I never want to forget that amazing day. I remember the first moment I saw her face--and how familiar she looked to me even though that was the first time I had laid eyes on her. I remember wondering if she looked like me, if she was going to sound like Caden, and praying that everything about her little body was healthy. I remember being so anxious for Caden to meet her, and wondering how I was going to be able to equally share my love between both my kids. All of those questions are answered now, and year later, as I stare at my baby girl, so many more questions flood my mind of who this little girl is going to grow up to be. Because, boy, is she growing up and growing up fast. She is still a little "pixie" (as we call her) at 18 lbs, but is 1 year going on 16. She already has an infectious giggle that brings a smile to her brothers face like no one else can. She has a dramatic flair, and has already figured out that she gets much more attention and reaction if she takes things up a notch. Our little TK looks like a tiny, harmless little thing...until she growls at you. Yes, growls. We can thank Caden for that. She can say 'mama', 'dada', 'ball', 'hi', 'bye bye' and tries to say 'where is it', 'there it is' with little inflections in her voice. Her speedy crawl gets faster each day, and while she tries to take guided steps daily, I am pretty sure she will be like her brother and stick with crawling for a while since its so much faster. She has this amazing mix of dependence and independence--she already wants to do everything herself, and yet wants you to just be in the room to watch her do it. She is cuddly, playful, spunky and already knows what she wants.
The first 6 months of Tessa's life were, to be honest, a huge challenge. She was pretty colicky and it was a really rough season. Then soon after we hit this season of sickness that we are still trying to crawl out of. So while this first year has not been by any means easy, it has been wonderful. I feel like some of those rough times are some of my most bonding moments with my little girl, and when I see her little gap toothed smile, I forget about the many drama filled, sleep less nights. Ok, so I don't forget them...but she is worth it. She still doesn't sleep through the night consistently, but that is completely consistent with our little TK. She wants us to know that she is still there, in case we forgot, and wants to have a little social time between 12 and 2 am.
I am constantly challenged as a mother, and know that God is continuing to shape and mold me as a person largely through my journey as a mother. You hear people often say it's the hardest job you will ever have--and that is the truth. But with the lowest of lows, comes the highest of highs. Often in the form of slobbery kisses, moments of watching your kids love each other, and being together as a family realizing your dreams have actually come true. This season of life has me on my knees constantly, both seeking wisdom and strength, and in gratitude for my 2 little gifts.Tessa Kate is such a gift--a little "mini me" who has so much love and joy radiating out of her being. I can't help but be a little sad that she is no longer a baby and is quickly transitioning into toddler-hood. But am excited for another year of milestones and memories with our little TK. Happy Birthday Tessa Kate. Your mom and dad love you more than we could ever express. It is our prayer that you continue to grow up knowing you are loved by those around you, and by your Heavenly Father who created you as the beautiful, unique and precious little Tessa that you are.
